As we approach Valentine’s Day and see reminders of love everywhere around us, the opportunity arises for us to evaluate how well we are loving others. It is one thing to say that we love someone, but often quite another thing to act in such a way as to show them that our words are true. However, even God Himself is demonstrative with His love: “…God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” (Romans 5:8) If God, who IS Love, chooses to demonstrate His love, how much more should we, who are not in essence love, do our best to do the same?
The reason that we know and love God is because of His demonstrative love for us. Because we love God, it follows that love for others should flow out of the love that we have for Him. St. Justin Popovich indicated such (and more!) results of loving God when he said, “Love for Christ overflows into love for one’s neighbor, love for truth, love for holiness, for the world, for purity, for everything divine, for everything deathless and eternal… All these forms of love are natural manifestations of love for Christ. Christ is the God-man, and love for Him always means love for God and for man.” And St. Basil the Great encourages us to demonstrate our love, not just for family and friends, but to everyone in his statement, “As God illumines all people equally with the light of the sun, so do those who desire to imitate God let shine an equal ray of love on all people.”
So, how are we doing? Is our love for God overflowing as it should into the lives of those around us? Are we telling others that we love them? Better yet, are we demonstrating our love to them by the way that we treat and interact with them? And how well are we demonstrating our love to all people, not just those we know?
Let us begin by better demonstrating our love to our children. Here are some ideas of ways to go beyond merely telling our children that we love them, showing them with our actions that our words are true:
This mom interviewed her daughters to find out their favorite ways that their parents show them love. We found the resulting list to be creative, fun, and inspiring! http://www.shelivesfree.com/2015/02/huge-list-fun-ideas-love-kids.html
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Loving our children does not have to be expensive or complex. Check out this list of 35 simple ways to love our children: https://amotherfarfromhome.com/love-your-child/
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If you are familiar with Gary Chapman’s book “The Five Love Languages,” you know that different people prefer to be loved in different ways. His book suggests these five ways in which people prefer to receive and show love: acts of service, physical touch and closeness, gift giving, words of affirmation, and quality time. This blog post encourages us to figure out which love language(s) are our children’s favorites, and to express our love to them in that way. It includes practical suggestions of ways to show love in each love language.
https://encouragingmomsathome.com/50-ways-to-love-your-child-every-day-using-love-languages/
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Creating memories together as a family is one of the best ways we can show our kids our love. This blog post features advice from a teen on what his parents did that created his best memories: https://www.familiesalive.org/2017/05/30/forcing-family-fun/
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This list of 25 questions to ask our kids will help each of us to learn more about our children. In the process, we will be demonstrating our love for them by expressing interest in their life! http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sponsored/finance/family-matters/11334865/questions-for-kids.html
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What if, this weekend, we closed our laptops in order to better demonstrate our love for our kids? https://michaelhyatt.com/close-your-laptop.html offers 3 compelling reasons why we should do just that, and what will be gained both personally and in our family when we do it.
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Cuddling our children demonstrates our love for them in a way that they need. And we need it as much as they do! Read more here:
http://amotherfarfromhome.com/9-reasons-must-cuddle-kids-good-society/
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God demonstrates His love for His children in so many ways. One way is that He has filled our world with glimpses of His love. Parents and children who enjoy nature can go out together and look for evidence of God’s love in our world. Here is a slideshow of heart shapes – a small sampling of the love He has tucked into the world for us to find: https://kids.nationalgeographic.com/explore/wacky-weekend/hearts-in-nature/
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What better way can we demonstrate love to children than to love our spouse? Building a marriage takes effort, and our children learn that by watching us. Here are some simple suggestions of dates to have at home. The date ideas listed here could happen when the children are away with friends/family or when they’ve already gone to bed. Let’s demonstrate love to our kids by setting aside time with our spouse! http://lifeofahomebody.com/10-fun-romantic-stay-home-date-nights/
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Demonstrating our love for our spouse spreads the love to our children. Date nights are one way to work at that process! Here is an idea for date night: at home, at an outdoor table in a park, in a food court, or at a train/bus station, play games together. Need ideas for two-person games? This blog suggests 20 different games that can be played with only two players:
https://tolovehonorandvacuum.com/2013/01/two-player-games-to-play-with-your-husband/
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In case you missed it: we wrote this blog about sharing love with others, not just at Valentine’s Day. The ideas in this blog can help our family to demonstrate God’s love to others as an outpouring of our own love for each other: https://orthodoxchristianparenting.wordpress.com/2017/02/15/on-sharing-our-love-beyond-valentines-day
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In case you missed it: we blogged about teaching our children how to love others by deliberately showing kindness to them, even to those we don’t know. It is one thing to demonstrate love to those closest to us, but the ideas in this blog help us to extend love to all around us, not just our family. https://orthodoxchristianparenting.wordpress.com/2014/02/12/try-a-little-kindness/
Orthodox Christian Parenting 